RED: better dead than red

Thanksgiving has come early this year thanks to this butter-basted over-ready turkey and it's left me with a severe case of indigestion. 
RED is an acronym for Retired Extremely Dangerous but it could equally well stand for Really Extremely Dire because it is. 

Really Excessively Deluded works equally well. Stars Bruce Willis, John Malkovich, Morgan Freeman and director Robert Schwentke labor under the misapprehension that they're making a comedy spy thriller in the mold of "Burn After Reading" rather than a complete mess, which this film also is.
What is intended to be an off-beat quirky, slight left-field romp comes off as a project that was put into production before the script was finished. The entire story feels disjointed, sketchy and, even by the 'suspend your disbelief' standards of comedy thrillers, nonsensical and implausible. 
Other than an oversize paycheck it's very difficult to discern what induced otherwise level headed actors like Brian Cox, Helen Mirren,  Mary-Louise Parker, and 93 year old Ernest Borgnine to get involved in this fiasco.